Transvox - Announcements - Open Mic and Allies Awards and a New Parent Group

[00:00:08] So good evening everybody, one and all from one end of the universe to the other end.

[00:00:15] Somewhere in Stoke is the person sitting in front of me, Jen, how are you doing?

[00:00:20] You're in structure, get your love good.

[00:00:22] I'll take the little bit, not watch for a few little, but yes, hi Gill, I'm absolutely great at how are you?

[00:00:29] How are you in Ducks? That's what you're in.

[00:00:32] It's Ducks?

[00:00:33] I was in Ducks. You said Ducks is more than one person.

[00:00:37] Okay, what about your split personality?

[00:00:40] Well there is that, but it's you know, a dog is a stoke thing.

[00:00:45] Anyway yes, I'm very well good, nice to hear it.

[00:00:48] Well I mean we're going to follow that episode today because I want to talk about a couple of different things

[00:00:52] because as you know we're linked, oblique into another charity which where they're sort of campaigning on,

[00:01:01] we keep an ons lens between us.

[00:01:03] But there is not quite interesting bits and pieces.

[00:01:05] I thought we could talk a little bit about these things which are going on

[00:01:09] and we can have a listen to some of their publicity stuff that's going on.

[00:01:14] So we're going to have a little bit of a gossip around the whole world of talent.

[00:01:18] So there's going to be an open mic in Southampton on 26th of September.

[00:01:25] And it's going to be an open night mic and there's going to be some well established drug artists as well coming into to do some stuff.

[00:01:32] But there are going to be people that are just going to come out with the audience and do their thing.

[00:01:38] But also what's happening is that someone we both knew very well Paul Drakeot,

[00:01:43] left us that the charity is some funny.

[00:01:46] And we've established an annual award for both trans people and allies of significance.

[00:01:53] And this is the first year's going to run.

[00:01:54] So as part of this evening, because Paul was such a fan of music,

[00:01:58] we thought it would be lovely to put those two things together.

[00:02:01] So I thought it's going to be really nice people can nominate

[00:02:03] if they want to go into the beyond reflections website.

[00:02:05] They could nominate allies or trans people of significance.

[00:02:08] Anyone who's think is made an impact in the community.

[00:02:12] I know you can't do that, Jankas, one of the trustees was going to be judging

[00:02:15] who these people might be.

[00:02:19] But anybody who wants to join in, but I think it's interesting is that

[00:02:23] there's enormous amount of talent in our community isn't that.

[00:02:28] Oh, there is.

[00:02:29] And then it's often untouched because people don't maybe,

[00:02:33] when you're trans confidence is a difficult thing.

[00:02:35] But there is clearly times.

[00:02:36] And I was like a great event, really does.

[00:02:38] I mean, you know, knowing Paul he was the ultimate trans ally from where I said

[00:02:43] for all the work he did, but also he loved her entertained.

[00:02:46] So I've been he would have definitely been up there singing probably you two song.

[00:02:51] So what I want to great event, but you're right about whether talent in the community

[00:02:59] is able to blossom and you know at the moment that,

[00:03:02] and whether we lose, you know, whether talent goes on notice but we definitely are.

[00:03:07] I think absolutely right.

[00:03:08] It sounds brilliant event, Jankas.

[00:03:11] And of course, you have that bag to tell him.

[00:03:15] I've certainly got a tell of the bags, so don't know.

[00:03:18] You've got a tell of musical.

[00:03:20] Yeah, you're the guy I am.

[00:03:21] What kind of thing is used to be musical?

[00:03:24] No, I am.

[00:03:25] Yes, I used to play, but I do love music.

[00:03:27] There's no doubt about that, but what's interesting is that you've got the arts

[00:03:30] and the threat and you've got all community in the threat as well.

[00:03:33] So it's lovely to be able to bring those just different interests and worlds together, isn't it?

[00:03:39] So I think that'd be quite nice.

[00:03:41] So what I'm going to do is I'm just going to play the advert from Abigail Park,

[00:03:46] so don't know who's going to talk to us a little bit more about the event.

[00:03:49] And then what we can do is just have a bit of a gossip after that.

[00:03:52] And then we can talk about the next thing I want to bring into the equation.

[00:03:55] So see on your other side of this, bit of audio.

[00:03:58] I'd like to just introduce you to Abbey Pocks, who is head of marketing and fundraising for the charity,

[00:04:04] who wants to take us through a really exciting event that we have planned for later in September.

[00:04:08] So Abbey tell us more.

[00:04:11] So yeah, we're launching our first annual Trans-Alice Celebration event in memory of one of our late trustees of Gaudrecoct.

[00:04:20] And we're going to be hosting an evening at the stage door dedicated to celebrating Quina,

[00:04:27] celebrating Alisha, celebrating the Trans community.

[00:04:31] And just having a very wonderful time,

[00:04:35] recognising the work of allies and trans people to make progress within the community.

[00:04:44] So Paul himself was a brilliant ally,

[00:04:47] and he was such a supporter in various NHS trusts in which he worked of trans people.

[00:04:53] And in fact, he recruited one of our other trustees, Jenny, who worked with me in other areas.

[00:05:00] So Paul is a brilliant ally,

[00:05:02] but it's also a man keen fan of music as well.

[00:05:04] We thought it'd be a great way to want to pull by saying,

[00:05:06] let's create an annual award for allies of significant trans people,

[00:05:11] as significance, but actually let's have some music as well.

[00:05:14] Let's have an evening of celebration of Queer Talent and just get together one place to celebrate the community

[00:05:21] and to show off the amazing talent.

[00:05:24] So I guess the first thing we need to just think about is we need to nominate people of significance

[00:05:29] who are actually allies or trans people.

[00:05:31] So how do we do that?

[00:05:33] Yeah, so there are two nomination forms on our website,

[00:05:36] be on Reflections.org.uk,

[00:05:40] and that is to nominate individuals or, you know,

[00:05:44] entire organizations can be nominated for their their allyship or trans-plus individuals

[00:05:49] or, again, trans-plus-led organizations.

[00:05:55] So yet, just fill out the nomination form and then our trustees will be looking at it

[00:06:00] and shortlisting the nominees to invite to the celebration event where we will then be picking a winner.

[00:06:10] Fantastic.

[00:06:11] And it's not about having a prize as much as just raising the sort of awareness of the great work that people do behind the scenes

[00:06:18] because I think sometimes we hear all the negative stories and we forget how many people are just doing great work without needing the glory in the fame

[00:06:26] but it's just sometimes lovely to raise them up and show this or contribution that they make, isn't it?

[00:06:31] Yeah, absolutely.

[00:06:33] Yeah, so it's about everybody kind of coming together and, you know, as you said, having a lot of fun,

[00:06:38] the night is also going to be an open-mic night.

[00:06:42] So anyone with any kind of talent can come up and get a bit jazzy on stage or, you know,

[00:06:50] people are more than welcome to just come along and watch. We won't be forcing anybody to perform.

[00:06:56] So let's say I'm interested in something. What sort of thing would be acceptable to come and do on stage?

[00:07:02] What I mean, because I know we've done this before, huntways and organization. It was really nice, a lovely evening.

[00:07:07] So what sort of things, as well, come?

[00:07:10] Yeah. So when we did it before, it was a comedy open-mic but we really want to open it up.

[00:07:16] So if you sing, you know, play an instrument, you still come and do comedy if you want or, you know, read a poem,

[00:07:23] anything else that you think would be fun and jazzy to do on stage and celebrate your talent?

[00:07:30] Sounds like.

[00:07:31] And again, how do I sign up for that? Or do I just rock up on the evening and buy ticket and then just appear?

[00:07:38] How do I let people know that I want to do this?

[00:07:41] So you can come on the evening and book a ticket but it would be much better for people to book an advance.

[00:07:48] Just because if you, if you do turn up on the night we can't guarantee that you'll be able to get in

[00:07:53] because there is limited capacity obviously. So on the same webpage, on our website, on the events page,

[00:08:02] under the nominations you'll be able to find the link to book your tickets or you can also have a look through

[00:08:08] the stage door website as well.

[00:08:10] And so when is it? What sort of time did you say and how much of the tickets?

[00:08:14] It is on the 26th of September. It starts at 630. What doors are at 630?

[00:08:19] I believe we're planning to start from 7 and it is £10 entry.

[00:08:27] And it's cheap.

[00:08:28] That is for that thought it was cheap and it will.

[00:08:31] I think it's the expression.

[00:08:34] Very good value and all of the money as ever that we raise is put towards our hardship fund

[00:08:42] and towards helping us provide our services. So get night out and a good feeling.

[00:08:48] So you can nominate an ally, nominate a trans person, nominate an organisation, buy your tickets,

[00:08:54] come along, either watch or join in and just have a just enjoy being part of the community.

[00:09:01] Absolutely.

[00:09:02] Great. And the link again? Where was it?

[00:09:05] So be on reflections.org.uk on the events page.

[00:09:10] Thank you.

[00:09:11] There you are. Interesting isn't it?

[00:09:13] I think you're brilliant.

[00:09:14] And that would be just such great work for the charity.

[00:09:18] If you nominate someone who is not in Southampton, which is absolutely fine.

[00:09:21] We're going to live stream these sort of prize giving bit.

[00:09:26] So it's possible for people to be able to sit online and have a look at it.

[00:09:30] But I noticed that on the Beyond Reflections website, they are already starting to put some of the wonderful quotes out.

[00:09:35] Because some people are really calling the heart about the effect that allies are having on

[00:09:42] spiritual, emotional, physical, emotional, cognitive health.

[00:09:47] And just that sense of people who just reach out and just help and also...

[00:09:52] I can never remember whenever there's something in the news that is particularly difficult.

[00:10:01] And people who know me on colleagues with people who know that are straws sometimes.

[00:10:07] And they do get people reaching out.

[00:10:08] And that means so much, and somebody says, are you okay?

[00:10:11] Yes, yes.

[00:10:11] That's great.

[00:10:12] And then the community we need that because we are such a disparate group.

[00:10:17] We are spread throughout the nation.

[00:10:19] You know, we've adopted here and there are many of us.

[00:10:22] Don't have a community living around us that we, in terms of an LGBT community.

[00:10:26] So much so.

[00:10:27] I like this so important.

[00:10:29] I think I think there's the allies on the trans side.

[00:10:32] But one of the things about these allies, which I think is interesting.

[00:10:34] I remember seeing this analogy once.

[00:10:36] There was this description of an ally, you know, like a trans ally.

[00:10:40] And then you were quoted as someone being in the sea, you know, drowning.

[00:10:44] And some allies, they sort of stand there in a podium and say, how mild is she or is she just appearing under the waves?

[00:10:49] Yeah, and some allies actually through a life raft or a jumping and will save you one lift, you walk in such light.

[00:10:55] And I think it's...

[00:10:57] It doesn't matter which one you are, but I think the most useful ones are those people who are actually advocates

[00:11:02] who are better than the next one that's open there. I think it's really important.

[00:11:06] Yeah, and people do that. I mean, I know sometimes people do that.

[00:11:10] They risk at the moment to me, I know one or two sort of, I guess, more famous ally people who speak out in our favor.

[00:11:18] And then obviously get the hang out, can get some, so abuse back what they've compared to do that.

[00:11:24] I think it's so important to think, yeah, no, it sounds like a great event, Jill.

[00:11:29] And the thing I like about it, of course, is because there's so many of our community who are intergaming or into IT,

[00:11:36] who are going to coding and all that sort of stuff. It's quite nice to be part of the bit of our community that's into the performing arts and such like.

[00:11:44] And if you want to come up with a poet or you want to do the dance, or you want to tell a journey, tell a story, or sing a song, or you want to play a recorder, whatever it might be.

[00:11:54] I've never heard of a recorder. I've never heard of a recorder, or you're a single.

[00:12:00] Oh, I'd love to be able to get down there, Jill. I'm not sure I am because I'm such a frustrated stand up.

[00:12:07] I could do a tie-five. You could do it. You could do it online. I'm sure we could be me away.

[00:12:13] Yeah, that sounds horrendous.

[00:12:14] But I'll just satellite tonight.

[00:12:17] It was sparkly. What was it? Sparkly burger you took extension to the sparkly?

[00:12:25] Well, that was the first thing I wanted to say.

[00:12:29] Yes.

[00:12:29] Thank you, Jill. I tell you the other thing that's been interesting as well.

[00:12:33] There's charities quite innovative. What they're doing is they're launching effectively at what they're calling.

[00:12:40] I think it's like a planned parenthood group, which is quite new.

[00:12:44] And it was brought to my attention by Aaron, who is a guest on our podcast about six weeks ago.

[00:12:52] They've launched this new group now and they're looking for people to come and join.

[00:12:56] They're looking for speakers who can come in and talk about all aspects of parenthood.

[00:13:00] But they're also looking for people who are experiencing maybe their transmask and they want to think about idea for freezing eggs or maybe want to think about how to deal with maternity services or, you know,

[00:13:12] how that, however that might work or maybe a part there of someone who's doing that sort of stuff.

[00:13:17] Or maybe you want to adopt or foster all those sorts of things.

[00:13:21] So the groups being pulled together to do that sort of thing.

[00:13:24] And I think it's also that thing about there are quite a lot of non-conforming relationships in our world as well.

[00:13:30] So I think it's quite interesting as that.

[00:13:32] How, again, that imaginative wave thinking about relationships and families is so wonderful about our community as men.

[00:13:40] Well, no, it's really important people, you know, a remb of the time, you know, where it was impossible for a single sets couple to adopt for instance and things.

[00:13:48] And you know, I mean the world we've changed so much, but yeah, it is still important. I think when the term planned parenthood, I think it's a miracle because I don't think it's on the internet.

[00:14:01] Everyone's going to come on and tell us about it in a minute.

[00:14:04] It's I'm sure there's no director, but it's it's about, but you know, parent's been a parent so far and have a family in our community which is something many of us sort of in the past.

[00:14:15] But I did resign itself not to be able to have a family when I transition. It's so interesting, important. So yes, yes.

[00:14:24] Well, he's our, and then he's going to come and tell us a little bit about it. I don't have a chat with him. And then we, you know, can we convene at the end? Okay. So I'll see on the other side of this.

[00:14:33] Hi, Aaron, how are you?

[00:14:35] Hi, I'm good. Thank you.

[00:14:36] I'm good. So some of you may or may not remember that we met Aaron for the first time on the 20th of July this year, 2024 and I'm came on with actually to this the honor actually really being of our first ever transmask guest which was peculiar really after all this time in all these hundreds of episodes we don't well not hundreds, but you know, so that was it. You are the you are exemplar example of a transmask person. So how's how about that?

[00:15:04] Yeah. Good. And so if anybody wants to access that, that's on the 20th of July and it's a broad introduction to Aaron and transmask guest use and such like and then you sort of casually mentioned you were interested in in the host subject of parenthood. So tell me a little bit more about that motivation and what you're thinking about.

[00:15:28] So it's the on the motivation behind that is, personally I'd like to be able to have a child at some point when I find the work partner.

[00:15:42] And I think for such a long time when I when I first started testosterone, I signed a piece of paper that said that it was medically recommended but I received a history with three to five years of going on testosterone.

[00:15:57] That is no longer a thing. They you don't it's not a medical recommendation that you're going to history it's a me intern amount of time anymore, that was done on bit research that was not very accurate.

[00:16:13] And I think it was about three four years ago that I had the conversation with my doctor at the genus connect who explains that it was entirely possible to come off hormones and conceive a child naturally and have a child naturally.

[00:16:32] And to be honest it I think it was something that I never thought I could do and now realizing that I can do that and it is entirely possible.

[00:16:43] I think it's something that I do want to do in the future instead of non assolance that but I don't want to look at lower surgery options because I want to have a child.

[00:16:54] And the one thing I've noticed though is there is no there's no support for people going through that process. The gender clinics can support you to an extent, but then not they're not pregnancy or prenatal service they're not like any of those services.

[00:17:15] So yeah it's not no idea if not what they're set up for and it is the most gendered of all the sort of medical services as opposed pregnancy isn't it.

[00:17:29] There is it's all aimed at mothers and motherhood and the reality is not everyone that has a win is going to become a mother and some of us are going to be fathers but there is no there is no maternity close for men.

[00:17:45] And things like that there are no all of the better thing classes and prenatal classes that all aimed at women. They're not aimed at them at all.

[00:17:55] So I think the aim here is with this new group I did I was talking about was to try and get them gasp because then to try and give that up what and create a space to that.

[00:18:09] Okay so that makes lots sense because I guess there's tons of issues I mean if you're going on and off hormones that's that's a challenge anyway but as opposed to.

[00:18:19] Storage of eggs this IVF there's a huge amount to sort of consider in this and every single one of those is highly emotionally charged and there's a medical procedure where.

[00:18:30] As you say it's not the NHS doesn't really set up to support anyone so so actually yeah it is hard to see where on going in forms support would come from but also pay support as well because that's really important and this isn't.

[00:18:45] Yeah I mean there are there are some places online where there are those sort of spaces up to be on a side I found one group on Facebook specifically for trans men is going through bursting and chest feeding and stuff like that.

[00:19:01] That's the only place that I have found something specifically for that.

[00:19:08] So yeah the point of this new group is to is to kind of create that space and yes we're not clinical we're not anything like that but.

[00:19:19] The goal is to provide emotional support and well being support to individuals where they're just simply isn't any and we're hoping to work in partnership with healthcare services and healthcare providers.

[00:19:34] To be able to give us was well I know the gender clinic I'm with nothing and the.

[00:19:40] The.

[00:19:40] The doctor there is currently creating a new pathway of healthcare for trans men who are.

[00:19:46] Going through pregnancy and passing and so hopefully we'll be able to work with them and provide some of the emotional support whilst they provide the healthcare other thing.

[00:19:58] That's great I mean having it linked into the NHS is really important isn't it because it's not meant to be seen as a.

[00:20:05] A place to criticize the NHS or anything else is about getting appropriate provision where it is required and yeah I mean the NHS and vendors for providing a lot of support for anyone never my.

[00:20:18] Transmen at the moment so it's you know it's a real challenge for the community isn't that so specifically who's the group going to be for.

[00:20:27] So the group is.

[00:20:30] Designs for anyone who is trans plus and who is trying to become a parent whether that be through somebody who is.

[00:20:41] A fine female at birth and decides to go through pregnancy whether they're on homies or not or whatever.

[00:20:49] It's also for people who are going through the process of adoption or so advocacy because they are also very long lengthy processes and I imagine that we might end up deploying some people that are going through the process of having.

[00:21:05] So this is a very important thing to do is to to make sure that you're going through the process of getting involved.

[00:21:12] And so I think that you can really be able to make sure that you're going through the process and that you're going through the process of making sure that you're going through the process of getting involved in.

[00:21:31] So that's quite a long can be a tremendously challenging process as well.

[00:21:37] So yeah, we'd like to support people through that process as well.

[00:21:41] So anything to do with being a parent basically and being a child.

[00:21:46] And so will the group's in mix still will it be sort of transfer or transmats?

[00:21:50] What's the intention here?

[00:21:52] Other moment the group will be next.

[00:21:56] However, I don't see any reason why down the line we couldn't set up.

[00:22:01] Mask and family non-binary groups.

[00:22:04] It depends how successful the group is really in how much demand we have to the third of it.

[00:22:10] To be honest, yeah.

[00:22:12] So if I pitch up to one of these groups, what will I expect?

[00:22:17] How does it run? How does it work?

[00:22:19] What will actually happen within a session?

[00:22:22] So we each group will naturally look slightly different to one another.

[00:22:29] Some groups were possible, we're going to have a guest speaker come in to the first half hour of the group.

[00:22:36] And that could be a healthcare professional.

[00:22:39] It could be like somebody like a do-la or midwife.

[00:22:43] It could be somebody who is who is challenged and a parent and has gone through that process already.

[00:22:50] Sharing their experience with the group and things they struggle with where they got support and etc.

[00:22:58] So you know, hopefully trying to get some guest speakers to come in.

[00:23:02] And then after that, we'll have a little break for five to minutes.

[00:23:07] People can ask the guest speaker any questions they have and then the guest speaker will leave.

[00:23:13] And after that, it will be more of the support side, which will basically be an opportunity for people with a guest speaker.

[00:23:20] Just got a different topic.

[00:23:23] And where sometimes it might look like we go around the room and people just have some time to talk.

[00:23:30] Other times it will be more, we might want to carry on talking about the topic discussed previously the guest speaker and might just bounce around between people and people sharing their experiences and supporting each other.

[00:23:43] And so the groups will vary with how they look. But essentially it will be have that first bit of the guest speaker and then it will be more of a supportive environment where we have that safe space people to share their experiences with one another and support each other.

[00:24:00] That sounds great. And I guess what you're trying to do is create a really open inclusive sort of feel to it.

[00:24:07] Because actually it's quite hard to find a place where you can just be yourself and really, you know, be vulnerable and from to people. And I mean this is the sounds like an ideal place.

[00:24:18] I'm so it seems like a blend between sort of practical support well being support and emotional support. So is that right? So so the facilitators of group that is must be quite special. So who would be doing those things.

[00:24:30] Yes, so myself. I will be facilitating the group with a co-fist facilitator who has also got experience in running other groups of group with VR and they are also a parent themselves.

[00:24:47] And I've gone through that process of being they are non-binary and having a child naturally as well. So I feel like it's good experience to bring to the group.

[00:25:01] Yeah, that's good. And so obviously you work for an organization called Beyond Reflections.

[00:25:07] And of course, there's beyond reflections who are actually making this work. So if people want to access the group or ask more or find out more how will they do that?

[00:25:19] So we will be putting out promotion materials for the group in the next week. It will be all over our social media platforms. It will be on our website. It will go out to all of our existing members.

[00:25:36] And on these promotion materials there will be QR codes where people can scan the QR code and they can go through the process of becoming a member.

[00:25:44] It's just filling out survey and somebody from the office will contact you because all of the people that attend the group will need to be members.

[00:25:54] And as a small membership fee that comes with that. But it also not only will they have access the group. They'll also have access to all the other services we offer like the once, once or the counseling that we offer and they will also have access to other emotional support groups.

[00:26:12] If they feel that that's something that they need as well.

[00:26:17] So yeah, the group will be accessible when they should be we should be getting that material out there and the next few days.

[00:26:24] Brilliant. And fantastic. So basically when does this go into all starts when do I need to get myself organized or and I'm guessing that even if I'm not ready for the first session I can join as I go so so it's our me practical detail is not.

[00:26:39] So our first session will launch on the 27th of September and following that the group will run every fourth Friday of the month.

[00:26:52] So yeah, and people can join at any point.

[00:26:55] So don't worry if you missed the first group because you haven't quite got your onboarded with your membership yet. Not a problem. You'll just join into the next one.

[00:27:03] Yeah, I'm guessing is a rolling because of course, parents who doesn't happen in a sort of very planned way. There's a sometimes I'm going to be called pathways to parent but it may well be this is not relevant for next six months, but you know is the plan to keep it with like a regular thing or is it just like for a sort of season how does it work.

[00:27:23] It will be a regular thing and it will be rolling. Obviously the path the path the parent had isn't straight.

[00:27:31] It's not it's not a linear and it's not the same for everyone. So I don't want to cut people off from it. I think there will be a case of every just someone has been in the group for six months.

[00:27:44] We do like a progress monitoring type thing where we see what what they've achieved with the group so far, where they're at the main where they'd like to be if the groups still help for them.

[00:27:55] If there's some other support within beyond reflections that might be suitable for them at that time. So we will be doing that on a six month basis.

[00:28:05] But there's not going to be a point where we turn people away.

[00:28:11] So we've got to have a couple of months to go on through that parent process. So I would like to be able to support people for up to that and that first year.

[00:28:23] We're seeing a parent. But yes, unless they are trying to have a second child.

[00:28:31] We would recommend that they go into if they still wanted support from our food, recommend they transition to a one of the emotional support groups rather than the parent group.

[00:28:42] The family group is it would be more appropriate at that point in time.

[00:28:49] So we'll put links up everywhere and I wish you all the best with it. It sounds absolutely brilliant.

[00:28:57] Path with the parenthoods, beyond reflections is the originating website.

[00:29:05] I'm sure there'll be a link to it somewhere that allows people to do something as you said you are a quick QR code.

[00:29:10] And all the best with it. I'd love you to come back maybe in six nine months and tell us how it's going. Would you do that?

[00:29:15] Yeah, that's really it. Thanks. Well, looks. Thanks for spending time with us today. Wish you all the luck. You take care. Yeah, thank you.

[00:29:25] There you are. Fascinating isn't it? I think it's really, I think it's really so close now. I mean, there's, I think the transmask world.

[00:29:33] I know it's not just for transmask people though. It's so under the radar, isn't it?

[00:29:38] It's only, in fact, of all the nastiness, all the hatred is about trans, then people are there. And it's interesting how many more transmask people are all.

[00:29:47] And how then it just doesn't seem to be met as well as ours.

[00:29:51] Well, the community is definitely changed in terms of that since we've become more aware of, in particular with in a sense with non-dubbano but identities and trans men, which, you know,

[00:30:08] I would say, it's trans men don't get abused but it's, they're almost invalidated, you know.

[00:30:17] You know, in fact, it's not, it's not talked about but yeah, more and more. I mean, I know in the NHS that, you know,

[00:30:37] which, so there's still refer to mothers but they say mothers and parents that give birth or, I use some more inclusive language because it can imagine it could be a quite a scary situation or feel difficult when you're a, when you are a man going to give birth in a maternity unit for instance, to start a family that way.

[00:30:54] Yeah, and also obviously there's, there's other ways to have families but yeah, that is becoming more and more, whereas I remember seeing a story in the newspaper about, you know, a trans man giving birth.

[00:31:03] You know, if you'd just go like it was such a weird, strange thing now but I don't think that is not the case now. I think everybody will understand this now that, that is not, you know, it's not an extraordinary thing to happen in many ways.

[00:31:17] And I think, I think life, what was interesting listening to Aaron talking about the fact that there are a lot of people who go through this and of course it is the most gendered of processes and a strange sort of ways.

[00:31:26] Yeah, and actually, you know, it's that having some support you go through because sometimes you can be very lonely, content.

[00:31:33] Well, that's why that's exactly why services that deal with the parents and even in my mental health trust we have a very,

[00:31:46] that they are being inclusive to help people feel more welcome as a, or because it must be very difficult. You're trying to set yourself as a man and you're in services that the majority, the vast vast majority of women and then that's, and that is absolutely the right thing to do.

[00:32:05] I mean, it is interesting now because you know, this is happening when I am, I know it's not a case now when I went to gender identity, by 2005.

[00:32:15] I think now people have given the option, if it's starting on one moment therapy or just a celebration to free sperm that wasn't ever offered and I think there has been some criticism in the past that so many of us transitioned.

[00:32:27] Where it could have been possible but it was never discussed with us, it was never discussed with me. I sort of accepted that you know that part of my life would go.

[00:32:38] Because I knew the effect of her hormone, HRT would have. And but yeah now I understand there's people are given some advice and offered you know if you can get to a clinic but you know that is available so trans people can still have families.

[00:32:54] You know it's a human right to be able to have a family, you know it's a fundamental right to a family and you know, you know people from the LGBT people community make brilliant parents and families.

[00:33:05] Of course, you know what they do. You see so many great examples of them.

[00:33:10] You know just look at them who's the couple, both trans couple that are quite famous she was in the army.

[00:33:19] I've got the name, the really famous has been telling quite a bit and they've had a child.

[00:33:24] And if it's amazing yeah, they've had a child.

[00:33:26] That's one of those stories, isn't it?

[00:33:28] Yeah, if it's been on the ball out of Google because they have had people with the same amazing,

[00:33:34] you know, they've had a child in figures from our community and you know how to form their own family.

[00:33:39] They're both transition and have their own family.

[00:33:42] So is it, is it chicken, had a graph?

[00:33:45] You're talking about that.

[00:33:45] That's right. They have a child, I think.

[00:33:48] Yeah, yeah, they have.

[00:33:50] My brain is mush.

[00:33:52] See your brilliance, you can remember all these things.

[00:33:54] I remember the stuff he's playing in he's watching tells.

[00:33:57] It boats well for when we're in a room later on just spend all my time trying to remember.

[00:34:01] Can you imagine that?

[00:34:03] Well, no one will know if you've got to person up person.

[00:34:06] Yeah, the person that was on the telly.

[00:34:08] Yes, yes.

[00:34:09] So there are great examples of trans families, you know, families that, you know, since people are

[00:34:14] transition.

[00:34:15] But I don't know how to really, so I think it's, you know, one of the great things that

[00:34:20] which grass wants you that just didn't seem to happen.

[00:34:23] Yeah, 15 years ago.

[00:34:24] But it's interesting, isn't it?

[00:34:25] Because what we hear is negativity and bad news in this.

[00:34:28] Yeah, but there's lots of trans organizations out there who are really doing good work.

[00:34:33] I was listening to someone talking about it and you report they've got to evidentially pick

[00:34:37] apart the classroom port because it looks like they're stuck with it.

[00:34:40] So they're going to do some work on actually how we do with that.

[00:34:43] There's trans organizations in Brighton taking on their local NHS services because such

[00:34:49] has an interesting way of looking at trans healthcare, which is often a pattern for the rest of the

[00:34:53] UK.

[00:34:54] There's organizations in Scotland, there are trans organizations all over the world as well as under

[00:34:58] UK.

[00:34:59] So well as one we work for in Southampton or we're linked to certainly.

[00:35:02] I would think it's very funny that we spend our like publicized things in Southampton and

[00:35:06] Annabelle, you cast a little in your and still come and try and so it is quite old isn't it?

[00:35:11] Yeah, yes, that's absolutely true.

[00:35:12] But yeah, I think we should, I mean, you know, you know, I can get frustrated and angry

[00:35:17] and down at times and I think you know, celebrating.

[00:35:20] I think it's amazing.

[00:35:23] Amazing to start for us as a chat for the charity really, to start and look at this.

[00:35:27] I think it's really important families are important.

[00:35:29] We're all too excited these days.

[00:35:32] I have to tell you that I'm from holiday for the next couple of weeks, but don't worry because we've got some good podcast

[00:35:37] episodes recorded and lined up ready to rock and roll.

[00:35:39] We've got, I don't even remember that answer screening project for trans people that say that was we are taking part in

[00:35:46] the charity again.

[00:35:47] There's two episodes about that.

[00:35:49] I've got one about trans surgery coming right as well and then the next time we're together

[00:35:56] we'll be chat no doubt about how close we get into the American election because of course

[00:36:01] did you see the, the, the, the, the hat lady coming out in support?

[00:36:07] Oh, the reason I'm so tired is I was up here.

[00:36:11] So I'm going to start with the next day.

[00:36:23] I think we have only mentioned trans people once in that and which is rare.

[00:36:29] What are the things that we're doing?

[00:36:31] The latest thing is coming out with us that it's people are going to school and come on the next day and they've changed.

[00:36:37] The school are making them change the tender and sending them back home as boys or girls that they weren't when they went.

[00:36:43] It's absolutely bar me isn't it?

[00:36:46] I mean, I just, but you know, then then this debate and there's this, managed to get hold, get hooked

[00:36:52] into some, man fabricated story about immigrants eating cats and that's all over.

[00:36:58] And of course, Taylor Swift's now endorsed.

[00:37:02] That's, that's absolutely brilliant.

[00:37:04] Yeah, we've got that and we're going to talk, we're going to talk about your holiday on loads of

[00:37:07] your holiday jails from your holiday jail.

[00:37:08] Absolutely.

[00:37:08] Enter cruise as well.

[00:37:09] So lots of opportunities to wear long frocks and all that stuff, yeah, yeah.

[00:37:14] Jo, Jo, Jo, Jo does a lot of cruising and she has holidays as well.

[00:37:20] Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

[00:37:23] Yeah, she's the coldest.

[00:37:26] See, I don't like notes.

[00:37:29] Oh, no, we will see you soon and have a great time, Jill.

[00:37:33] Oh, I sure.

[00:37:34] And don't think of a story.

[00:37:35] And then don't forget that the podcast will still be going.

[00:37:38] All I have to do is to figure out on this new recording thing which I'm using today, how

[00:37:43] you turn the week recording thingy off.

[00:37:45] Oh, there it is.

[00:37:46] Everybody's here.

[00:37:46] Here's a big thumbs up button.

[00:37:53] Thanks for listening to this episode of Transvox.

[00:37:56] It's been a joy to have you with us.

[00:37:58] If you want to make contact with us, you can contact us at Jillian at Transvox.com.uk.

[00:38:07] And if you'd like to support the work we do, please go to Patreon and go to page Transvox.

[00:38:12] And all of our money goes to our nominated charity.

[00:38:16] And Jen, you've chosen the charity for the next number of episodes which one of you chose.

[00:38:20] Our charity is called Beyond Reflections, which is a charity that provides support

[00:38:25] and counseling to trans people, non-binary people and their friends and their families across the UK.

[00:38:32] And amazing charity doing some amazing work really important.

[00:38:35] So please if you can give.

[00:38:37] Great.

[00:38:38] And if you want to go and have a look at Beyond Reflections, it's beyond hyphenreflections.org.uk.

[00:38:43] And as I say, if you'd like to make a contribution to what we're doing because we love to help the people who are well-pots.

[00:38:48] Again, if you've got ideas for the show, things you'd like to ask us, questions, comments,

[00:38:54] applause, or brickbats feel free to send it all into Gillian at Transvox.co.uk.

[00:39:01] And until the next time, goodbye. Bye bye.